旼컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴� � Words from Billy Belceb� - Agur � Billy Belceb�/DDT 읕컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴컴� Maybe you are surprised, maybe you are not, but i am leaving DDT. This is a hard hit for me, because zAxOn and myself formed this group, and i know we are beginning to be known. We made a very good first step with this magazine that, by the way, is or presentation card to the virus scene. But because various reasons i leave this group. First of all, as most of you know, due a pshychopathic attack of my neurotic mother, i have no more access to the net, so my lack of organization only can harm the group. I took the option to make zAxOn the new organizer, and i think he has experience organizing this, so i leave all in his hands. I trust in him. Another reason for my "give up" is because my life is a hell, i failed two subjects (i haven't failed any subject in my life before) and one of them was maths, so... ima- gine... Maths are very important for do what i want to study in the univer- sity. After many time thinking, i realized that i had to choose between be the organizer (without coding viruses) of DDT, or become a virus coder ra- ther than the organizer. I chose the second one, and i think i did the right choice. You may wonder why i don't leave the group and remain simply as a virus coder. Well, this has a simple reason. I tried it this last month, but i realized it sucked, if not more, the same time that i spent while i had access to internet. And, i wasn't the organizer. So i want to test new expe- riences. I think that i did the right choice leaving the group in the relea- se of the first issue of the magazine. As this magazine has some interesting stuff, the name of the group will be remembered (that is what we are always trying) and nobody will remember my name. And this is what i am searching for when leaving. DDT is not Billy Belceb�, DDT is not only a virus group. DDT is a way for live the life, a group of friends that have in common one hobbie, that make their memmbers' life to be better: write viruses. DDT will grow in the future, our present and future memebers will be very succesful, and this make me to be happy. I won't be with them, but i hope that our friendship will remain during the time. zAxOn will be better organizer than me, i am sure of it. We started from zero, we are in the scene so little ti- me. We are probably the most fast growing-up group ever... I think that the legacy of the group is very important. So, never give up guys. Don't be as i am. By the way, as i don't know what the destiny will bring to me, i can't say nothing such as "i will remain independent", "i won't rejoin the group in the future" or "i will join another group". Who cares. If one day in the future i think that i have a possibility of doing something, i will do, and never doubt it. Never say never. I don't know. Maybe one day, another group calls me, and i join them. Or maybe i want to remain independent. Or maybe i want to re-join DDT, and their members accept me (or not, who knows), or ma- ybe, or maybe, or maybe... Pffff, don't annoy me with that. Heh, i'm still too young for resposablilities... fuck, i'm 16, and i have to carry as good as possible my "real" life, and never doubt i will try to carry a normal li- fe, and if virus coding bothers it, i will leave all. As in all the things in my life, in the culture i live, and in this group where i was the organizer, i am not essential. The only thing i could say about the time i passed in this group is that i fought all as i could, and never have any doubt about it. But now i feel that i can't do anything more for the group. This group is full of wonderful people. I only have to say an "excuse me", "sorry" and such like to them. No one else. If you think i betrayed someone, well, it's your thought and you are free to think. I think i have never been arrogant with other people, i have never felt superior... ain't my style. If you still want to criticize me, please send your opinions (that i will try read and reply as soon as possible) to billy_belcebu@hotmail.com Well, about my situation now, i am a little bit depressed. Not as other peo- ple, because i think that there is other people with problems much more important than the problems i have, anyway i feel sad, without use, empty, and many other things you can't understand unless you passed a hard time, as i am now. I hope it'll pass soon, and the things of my life will go better. I think my situation is because the factors i explained before: i miss some people of inet, i don't feel motivated to use the same time as before the computer, my student's life is going bad since the school i went for 13 ye- ars closed, and i had to meet new and strange people for me in a goddamn kinda-catholic school (well, this is bad for me... just think that i don't like any kind of fanatism that all the religions requires), i am not very sociable... add to it that in my "real" life i am excessively shy. My only consolation is to remember with a smile all that the good times i passed in the group: its fundation, when zAxOn and me were in his house and finished NOP 0.666 (mmm... i can't remember it correctly, but i think it was about October-November of 1997), when i finished without zAxOn help (he co- uldn't do it with me, because he failed many subjects) the NOP 1.666 (one year ago, around March of 1998), when i connected for the first time and talked with Super, and i realized that the VX weren't as i imaginated (i thought they would be arrogant people, feed by their own feeling of superi- ority) and i saw that he and almost all the another guys i knew in irc hispano the first week i could connect (in last days of June of 1998) were very kind people, and another week i could connect after summer, and the first time i met with another VX, Super, and when i bought a 56k modem and installed a line in my room, and when i connected the first time to undernet with all the wonderful people there, and when i published the first web that DDT had, and when i infected for the first time the PE, and when i saw in PC ACTUAL the name of the group, and when i saw it in PCMANIA, and when new members joined the group... Many good experiences of my life were in this group. And yes, they mean and will mean something for me, but now i have to go, and there is no turning back. I wish zAxOn all the luck i didn't have, and i really want him to avoid all the errors i did. He's one of my best friends. I expect that he will guide the group through the right steps. And this is to the guy that went to IRC with my nick, my beloved and origi- nal nick, and began to say bullshits, DEFAMATE ME (!), and said that i was busted by the police, and i that gave names/phones/addresses of VX members and such like: I'M NOT LEAVING BECAUSE YOU, STUPID! And excuse me for all the ambient of paranoia that could happened to #vir while people thought so, but the responsible will pay it (again). Me busted? Am i a non-trustable person? Am i not able to guard secrets that involve another persons? Hah, it is clear that this pseudo-human person doesn't know me. And i saw that some of you have doubt about me... Btw, thanx to VirusBuster and Wintermute for notify my what happened as fastly as they could, with expensive phone calls (i owe both ya one). I hope this undesirable guy won't do it again, anyway if you have talked with me somewhere in time, you'll know me if i get conne- cted to IRC, specially if you are a friend, ok? I have to mention to all the people that helped me somewhere in time with their moral suport: Owl, Super, Darkman, Wintermute, b0z0, Int13h, StarZer0, nIgr0, Vecna, VirusBuster, The Mental Driller, Rajaat, Roadkill, and of course, all the DDT past and future crew. If i forgot anyone in this list, forgive me, you know who you are. I hope to see soon DDT#2, keep the good work, my dear pals. In my madness, in my sadness, i am my own savior... Billy Belcebu (ex-DDT).